Talking About Race



 

Looking for concrete ways to engage in allyship? One way is developing the ability to talk about race. We’re inspired this week by the following post from @psychforthepeople: 

 

Talking about race constructively is really difficult. However, when we can, it can heal racial and ethnic divides while reducing prejudice and misinformation. So, what gets in the way of talking about race? 

Talking about race is so hard because: 

 

* We exist in a white supremacy culture that silences any potentially “offensive” or “uncomfortable” topics. 

* When we do talk about race, it triggers and heightens powerful, uncomfortable emotions (for example, defensiveness, anxiety, anger, and helplessness) that are often deemed “unprofessional” in academic and/or work spaces. 

* Talking about race can challenge people’s entire worldviews, which can feel threatening to the idea that one exists in a fair and just world. 

* For People of Color, talking about race with others could expose them to discriminatory, hurtful, and/or invalidating statements. 

* For white people, talking about race with others can be hindered by fears of appearing racist, of realizing their racism, of acknowledging white privilege, and of taking responsibility to combat racism. 


How do we start to talk about race in light of all of these difficulties? Research* has pointed to the importance of the ability to acknowledge, validate, and facilitate discussion of feelings as being crucial to successful dialogues about race. 


What does this look like? In a recent conversation I had about race: 

 

* I noticed my shoulders tensing and my heart racing

* I asked myself, “What am I feeling?”

* I labeled my feeling as “anxiety”

* I then asked myself, “What is this feeling telling me?” Anxiety was telling me that this conversation about race was challenging my worldview. 

* I was in a supportive space, so I went an extra step and shared my feelings, saying, “I’m noticing I’m feeling anxious right now because this conversation is challenging me to reevaluate my worldview.” It felt vulnerable, but allowed space for people to really understand where I was at and share their similar experiences of what it felt like for them to reevaluate their worldview. 


Remember: If you want to talk about race, it will feel uncomfortable at some point because a lot of people were not raised with language or norms that made talking about race feel comfortable. Being able to identify and talk about uncomfortable feelings can feel new, overwhelming, and vulnerable - that’s okay! Engaging in activities that get you more in touch with your feelings such as journaling, grounding exercises, or talking to other supportive people can serve as a great starting point. 

 




 

* Sue, D. W. (2013). Race talk: The psychology of racial dialogues. American Psychologist, 68(8), 663. 


#blacklivesmatter #antiracism #allyship #education #psychology #mentalhealth #nanooknation